Did it start with the Bogeyman under your bed, waiting to grab your feet?
Or was it the eerie feeling of desolation when you lost your mother's hand for a moment in the crowd?
When did this fear walk in? Without even making a noise,
When did it become okay to fear, to run and to hide?
How come the things you heartily chose yesterday are the things that overwhelm you today?
The path that seemed to be flowering roses is a bed full of thorns?
Why is the fear of being vulnerable more than the regret of never saying what needs to be said?
For those words need to be thrown out there, thrown open into the air.
It must be the desire for perfection,
or the want to please them all.
It must be the fear of looking like a damn fool,
or the need to appear stone strong.
Because why are you so busy running, when there is nothing to run from at all.
8 opinions:
As a expression this is a pretty good piece but just a few things, desolation is more similar to despair and anguish whereas the appropriate emotion would've have been that of fear. 6th line, path doesn't go with bed, they imply different things. 10th line, replace want with need. And I don't understand the relevance of 'Because' in the last line. These are just my views as a reader, I'm not a professional writer, just a wannabe, so...
As an* expression
Desolation even stands for loneliness/ a feeling of abandonment so I think it is apt. Anyway a feeling for any situation always depends from person to person.
I'll keep in mind about the 6th line kinda error next time :)
10th line - I 'want' it to be 'need' there. It sounds more right.
As for the last line, that's what poetic license is for.
I kind of disagree on the desolation thing but fair enough. I would also like an honest opinion, if you will - https://sarvsin.wordpress.com/2014/02/13/the-conflict-the-confusion/
We all need to accept things and move on. That's what we need to do.
A good thought expressed in a nice way :)
Hey. This is beautiful :)
Hey. This is beautiful :)
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